What the hell am I doing gracing people with my company when it's not appreciated? I mean, as soon as they get bored of me it's, "Go to sleep now Annie" Jesus. I don't think anyone knows how much it upsets me to know that people think I'm boring and annoying. I guess I am boring and annoying. But I can't be fucked trying. I can't be fucked being this lonely. I need to find something else, outside of all this crap. I can't take being the backup plan anymore. Kiss my fucking ass. I won't be used.

My sister invited Ryan to her birthday thing. He said he'd go. It's funny. My sisters love Ryan. Sibz's sister says she's in love with Harry. Maybe this whole crush thing is genetic.

So after a very worrying stripping game Sibz and Harry ended up completely naked in the bed and I was topless. God knows what we would have said had Sibz's mother walked in.

I wish I was dead.

That kind of puts a dampener on my whole trying to be happy charade doesn't it.>