I was talking to this townie girl in my sociology class. We were talking about self injury and she expressed some almost offensive views, and then confessed that she just did not understand why anybody would want to do it. I was talking to her about how I think that it's ridiculous that in 5 years of compulsary "PSHE" we covered sex, drugs, family problems, careers, you name it, but we did not once cover depression, self harm, suicide, or anything like it, and I think that there should be more education about it. She asked me if I meant education to teach "them" the consequences of it, or just to show that some people do it or what. I was a little bit confused by her, I admit, and then I realised that her view of it was completely different to mine, not because she disagreed with me as such, but because of a misunderstanding we had. We were seeing self harm as two comppletely seperate things.

She was thinking of it as a problem in and of itself. She said, "Why don't they just cut their wrists. It'll kill them eventually anyway, so why make it take so long?" She was seeing it as a problem, and I was seeing it as a symptom of a problem.

I think the easiest way to identify what it is, is to think baout how you feel when a friend does it. Okay, you're worried, but what about? Are you worried about the fact that they might hurt themselves? (That's what one might assume people would be worried about, although serious injury is pretty unlikely if you're dealing with a vaugely intelligent person) or is it that you're actually worried more about the REASONS that they're doing it. I think the reasons are the problem, not the self injury itself.

And so I have learned a lesson. It's easier to communicate if you're speaking the same language.>