I'm putting 2 and 2 together and I'm getting a rough gist of the answer... it's somewhere around 4, but... I honestly don't know what I'm talking about. I'm sorry.

Anyway, I'm sorry my entries have been so boring since the summer ended, that's just because I've been having rather an interesting life and so I've been feeling a need to talk about that rather than all the big thoughts that I used to have. I feel like they just... died somewhere.

Ezra asked me what my views were yesterday. I asked what views, and he said "On anything". I could honestly not think of a thing to say. Now I've always been widely regarded as an increadibly opinionated person. Is that changing? Am I changing? I know I'm changing, I can almost feel myself changing. I'm not even the same person I was last fucking week.

I don't want to change. I was just begining to like myself. I was just begining to gather some self respect. Not being all egotistical about it, but I was.

I did one essay. Out of 4. It's kind of imperitive that I do the other English one because he's getting.. well.. worryingly pissed off with me. And the history one too. Sociology's the only one I can really afford not to do or to put a half assed effort into and that's the only one I'd actually enjoy doing. Irony? Nah, I think it's just cause I like sociology, which is probably because that's the lesson I have that I'm easily the cleverest in. Also the lesson with the most girls... I swear men are naturally more intelligent... I mean I know all research suggests otherwise, but all personal experience suggests that its true. Maybe girls just work harder.

Which I don't do, so I'm probably the stupidest of them all.

Or maybe it's just that there are some VERY intelligent boys and some VERY stupid ones wheras all girls are the same. Giggly, gossipy and chatty. Man and I was brought up as a feminist. I think my mum made a mistake somewhere along the line... probably something to do with all the hypocracy. Or to do with me being very gay. I think I'm going to take Nathan's advice and just go down the lesbian route, see if it works out any better... probably not... hm.. maybe I could be completely straight? I'd never be able to tolerate a relationship with a girl for too long I don't think. Just one night stands. Damn. Well maybe I should go down the slutty route and only having one night stands.. I can actually see that working for me...

oooh! oooh! I could be a prostitute and actually get money from all these 1 night stands! I could be a kinky prostitute! (Damn... Ezra's having a bad influence on me)

You know, I think they should make educational rap songs... lemme think

yo yo forget about da pimps and prostitution

how about learnin' 'bout da constitution

now our constitution is a fuck up

everyone say (singing) The British constitution is a fuckup...

And da constitution it's all a bit fucked up

In all these different places from all these different sources

sources - sauces - sorces - sauces

...you get the picture

okay okay, I'll stop being prejudiced against those with a bad musical taste. Although, let's face it, cool people can like bad music. Ezra's musical taste is absolutely DIRE. (I won't even go into it, he has Garath Gates in his CD collection. The best thing in there is The Cranberries) dear lord.. and he's obsessed with George Michael (I think.. he has so many albums it's .... scary)>